A Serious Question For You Ladies…
Okay, so let me start this post by just saying that you should really read it and think about it before you start typing in that comment box, or calling the media or shopping Orlando vacation packages or whatever reaction you think you’re going to have. Because I’m genuinely asking the question…what’s with the cleavage in the workplace?
Okay, so look, I’m a guy. I’m not ever going to tire of looking at boobies. Not until I’m dead. But, on the other hand, I’m in a place where I’m expected to be a professional. And I’m fine with that. But if you’re going to wear clothes that show me 25-35% of your boobs, I’m going to look. I have to. It’s how us dudes are wired.
So, what are you trying to prove?
Look, I’m not saying you have to wear restrictive clothing. I’m just saying that you really shouldn’t be shocked when you catch my eye possibly straying toward your boobs. It’s not that I don’t respect you; it’s just that boobs are really, really, really pretty. (See picture at right.)
(For the record, I’m not the only blogger/content creator that has noticed this trend. Brian Joyner noticed it. Barbara Bartlein also noticed. So there.)
June 25th, 2010 at 2:25 pm
Well – if you are looking and they don’t “like” it they can go and complain that your oogling is sexual harassment. You’d better be careful with your wandering eyes!
Patrick D. Reply:
June 25th, 2010 at 2:30 pm
Good luck proving, in a court of law, that I glanced at a boob.
June 25th, 2010 at 2:34 pm
For the record, I didn’t say it was okay to leer or stare or take pictures with your camera phone and send them to me at my email address. Just so we’re clear.
June 25th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
As an architect, I’m surrounded by men all the time, whether my draftsmen, colleagues, consultants, contractors, etc. I don’t wear tight clothing or anything that shows any cleavage at all to the workplace, ever. When I was teaching I cautioned my female students to do the same. It comes down to making sure I’m being taken seriously, which I’ve found is much more difficult to do when a guy is looking at my chest instead of the drawings.
However … I do agree also with DClacks that men are responsible for controlling themselves. The woman may be dressed unprofessionally, but a man who is obviously ogling is *behaving* unprofessionally, and most of the time, that’s what will be remembered more, and there are ramifications (not just legal). For example, there is a local Manufacturer’s Rep whose lines don’t get specified by female designers very often because no matter what a woman wears, his eyes linger between the neckline and the table.
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Patrick D. Reply:
June 25th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
As I said before, I’m not suggesting that leering or staring are acceptable behavior. My point is that I’ve worked with people who had their boobs hanging out and there wasn’t a pole in the room. You want equal treatment, which I’m down for, then don’t drag sexuality into the room.
June 25th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
If I don’t want dudes looking at my boobs, I wear an unflattering, oversized shirt. If I want to look “hot,” I may wear a cleavage-enhancing top, etc. When I do, I expect that guys and girls are going to look. That’s the price I pay.
The only time I get offended is when a certain (man, I want to call his jerk out right now) starts making lewd comments and touching me inappropriately. You can look, but you can’t touch. And when I tell you to stop and you continue… ugh, I should’ve alerted security.
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Patrick D. Reply:
June 28th, 2010 at 10:05 am
I’d tell you to call him out here, but only six other people would ever see it. You know, traffic numbers and such…
June 25th, 2010 at 8:59 pm
The boobs are out for attention. There is no other reason to have them out. So, if you are being stared at, because your mammaries are hanging out, YOU ASKED FOR IT!!! Men are visual creatures. Women know it. Thats why we wear lingerie, thongs and low cut shirts. We know you ‘are wired that way’. So, again, there is no reason to wear such low cut tops, unless you are seeking attention.
Patrick D. Reply:
June 28th, 2010 at 10:04 am
Damn, why don’t you tell us what you really mean?
June 26th, 2010 at 10:25 am
I don’t think anyone at our office dresses like a hoochie…maybe I’m not around enough.?.?
Patrick D. Reply:
June 28th, 2010 at 10:03 am
I’m going to refrain from commenting here. We can chat elsewhere about hoochies. :>
June 26th, 2010 at 12:03 pm
We only ‘expose’ what we want to have others see. We can’t expect to dangle steaks in front of lions and not have them sniffing around for a taste. Duh.
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June 26th, 2010 at 12:15 pm
Ps. I have found that sometimes my clothes don’t quite fit right (especially if I am sitting down & considering clothes in my size are limited…) and shirts can gape open more than I prefer but I try to pay attention to it and pin closed some of the tops that tend to gape inappropriately. I agree that men are hardwired to look….but I also agree they should be responsible for atleast trying not to gawk. I think modesty on the part of women should be practiced in the workplace as well as everywhere else. Especially in young ladies….but I suppose that is a blog post all to itself. I actually saw 2 young ladies HITCHHIKING in Lemay the other day! I went back and scolded them and reminded them how dangerous that is. It’s a shame!
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June 27th, 2010 at 11:52 am
I totally admit to showing cleavage with just about every shirt I own. I’m fine with it, and I don’t mind a *bit* of attention, heh.
Patrick D. Reply:
June 28th, 2010 at 9:40 am
I KNEW IT! Now, the truth comes out…
June 27th, 2010 at 2:23 pm
Well, Ive seemingly mastered the fine art of subversive ogling, and genuinely believe these girls who dress this way expect it, but I go through great lengths to be very low key about it. Maybe thats why Im referred to as a professional dirtbag…..but I wouldnt change a thing. Word to the ladies….We like em and we are going to look….were all watching….but some of us are better than others at doing it. Dont get mad, its actually a compliment. A song from Rodney Carrington comes to mind:”Show them to me”
July 22nd, 2010 at 10:11 am
Gosh, I love the picture on this post…